


The shirt

by leog2733



Category: Simonverse | Creekwood Series - Becky Albertalli
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-02-27
Updated: 2019-08-19
Packaged: 2019-11-06 12:57:57
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 11,692
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17940131
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/leog2733/pseuds/leog2733
Summary: Simon finds the note inside the shirt right away.Simon and Bram starts their relationship while Bram is still closeted.





	1. Chapter 1

_The shirt is a medium, and it's vintage soft, and everything about it is entirely, amazingly perfect. For one wild moment, I think I'll find a bathroom and change into it right now._

_But I stop myself. Because it's still weird. Because I still don't know who he is. And the idea of him seeing me in the shirt makes me really self-conscious for some reason. So, I keep it neatly folded in the bag, and then I put the bag in my locker._

I go to math class, and all I can think about is the shirt that's inside my bag. It's a piece of Blue, right there at the reach of my hand, and I quickly realize that I won't be able to concentrate on anything today.

Right as the bell rings and dismisses us from math class, I run to my locker and take my bag out. I then run to the nearest bathroom and thankfully it's still empty. I get inside one of the stalls and close the door. I badly want to wear the shirt it's all I can think about.

I take the shirt out of the bag and hold it up in front of me. When I unfold it I feel something in it. I reach inside and there's a second note! The same blue-green construction paper and the same neatly straight handwriting on it. I can't contains my feelings and a huge ass smile appears on my face instantly. I read the note.

_P.S. I love the way you smile like you don't realize you're doing it. I love your perpetual bed head. I love the way you hold eye contact a moment longer than yo need to. And I love your moon-gray eyes. So if you think I'm not attracted to you, Simon, you're crazy._

_And underneath that, he's written his phone number._

I read the note again, and then again, and then again. I can't believe it. After all this time I have blue's phone number in my hands. I can call him right now and know who it is. I can text him during class and get a reply. I can start something real with him right this second.

But I can't do this right now. We're in school. We have classes. I have rehearsal afterwards. Blue deserves better. He deserves all the time and attention that I have, so I decide to text him as soon as I get home after rehearsal, and I mean right the freaking second I get to my room and close the door. I open a new contact in my phone with Blue's number, naming it, of course, Blue, then put the shirt back in my bag.

The rest of the school day goes by in a haze. I really couldn't repeat a single thing said to me. I vaguely remember weird looks from Leah at lunch, but not much more than that.

After rehearsal I dash to my car, but I get intercepted by nick in the parking lot.

"hey" he says.

"Hi Nick, what's up?" I say, not really interested about the answer. All I can think about is getting un my car and drive home.

"I'm going with Garret and Bram to Waffle House and I told them I would wait a bit for you and Abby to finish rehearsal. Let's go, they left about 5 minutes ago in Garret's car". Right then, and without me noticing, Abby materializes herself next to me and says "Cool. Let's go."

I really can’t think of an excuse not to go, although I try really hard. My mind is completely blank. So that is how I find myself driving to Waffle House, with Abby in the seat next to me, and Nick in the back seat. All I can think about, is how badly I want to be in my bedroom right now, talking to Blue.

When we get to Waffle House, we see Garret and Bram sitting on opposite sides of a booth next to the big window of the restaurant. We reach them and Nick and Abby slide in one side next to Garret, so I go and sit next to Bram, that on any other day would probably make me a bit nervous, but I can't even bring myself to think about his sexy soccer calves right now. My mind is all Blue, all the time.

After we order, Abby start checking her Instagram feed, and Nick, Garret and Bram start to argue about who the best Spider Man actor is. Nick is fiercely defending Toby Maguire as the best one, while Bram says that Tom Holland is so much better. They both agree though that Garret's pick of Andrew Garfield is seriously misguided.

The argument goes on for several minutes, and even Abby pitches in (she has a crush on Tom Holland… Don't we all…).My thoughts drift back to Blue. Does he look like Spider Man? That could be nice. Maybe he has more of a Superman type body? No… There's no way someone that grammatical could have a Henry Cavill type body. If anything he's probably more of a Falsh type. Athletic nerd. Maybe Kid Flash? That actor is hot.

Anyway I can't seem to think about something other than Blue. I really can't take it anymore. The guys continue their argument, and Bram even took out his phone and started quoting data from IMDb, regarding all the different Spider Man movies.

I decide to take advantage of the fact that they are all distracted, and text Blue.

I take out my phone and start writing a text. What should I write? Something witty? Something funny? Something deeply emotional? Should I tell him I think about him all the time? Should I tell him that I really badly want to kiss him, no matter who he is? Should I comment about the shirt?

I think that it's best to keep it simple. I don't know how fast he want's to go or if he even wants to meet me now. So I type "Hey Blue" and hit send.

All of a sudden I notice that the guys aren't talking anymore. It appears that Bram was in the middle of saying something about how much money each Spider Man movie made, and he just went quiet.

Everyone is looking at him expectantly, and I look at him as well. I notice that he is fixed on his phone, so I look down to his phone and I see a text. From an unknown number. My Number. To Blue. My text that I sent Blue.

A lot of things happened at the same time. Garret was flashing his hand in front of Bram's face and starts saying over and over again "Earth to Bram". Bram turned his head and looks at me, and when he noticed my eyes on his phone, he quickly puts it down and I am almost certain I see a flush rising in his face. I, on the other hand, just sit there, mouth open, can't believe what just happened.

I think back on all the clues I know about Blue's identity. Half Jewish (Greenfeld is a Jewish name!), grammatical (Bram is great at English), his father is an English teacher (BRAM IS GREAT AT ENGLISH), parents divorced (I don't know anything about his parents), the same name as a president (I really should know more about U.S. history).

When I notice that Bram is looking at me, a bit scarred, a bead of sweat running down his temple, I look back at him, with the biggest smile I have. Cute Bram Greenfeld is Blue. Cute Bram Greenfeld with the soccer calves and grammar. I don't think I could be happier.

When he sees my smile I can see him relax, and then it happens. Bram smiles, and he has the sexiest smile I have ever seen.

The whole thing takes about two seconds, but it feels like we had an entire conversation in those two seconds. I quickly rebound and then I notice that everyone is still looking at Bram, who stopped talking mid-sentence. I have to help him.

"I think Tom Holland is much better than Toby Maguire. He really does act like a normal teenager, who happened to get supernatural powers, and not act like what a 20-something-year-old thinks a teenager acts like".

Simon to the rescue. It's just enough to get everyone back to the argument, but this time Bram is significantly less engaging. You can see his head is somewhere else, like he is trying to build up the courage to do something. Is he going to come out right there and then?

Then, I feel his hand, searching my hand under the table. He touches my hand, which was resting on my leg, and after a second he took his hand back. Does he really think that I will let it go on like that? That after feeling his hand on my I can go back to regular life like nothing happened?

Without too much thought I grab his hand. It's just us. Nobody else can see it. It's the best feeling I ever had. We just sit there, talking to our friends about nothing and everything, and holding hands. We separate when the waitress comes with our food, so we could eat normally, but as soon as we are finished we go back to holding hands.

I really can't get my head around it. Cute Bram Greenfeld. I look at his face every chance I get. He is so good looking. His cheeks, his skin tone, the freckles on his face. This is the same  boy I've been emailing for months. This is the same boy that probably knows more about me than anyone else in the world. This is the boy that I dreamed about kissing and other stuff.

Oh no. my head is racing towards doing Other Stuff with and to Bram. I have to think about something else and fast, because we're finishing up here, and I really can't stand up right now.

Thankfully, Abby starts talking to me about rehearsal, and my mind slowly calms down. When we get up, Bram whispers in my ear "volunteer", and I have no idea what he means.

The next thing I know we all stand outside of Waffle House, saying good bye when suddenly Bram says "Shit! I forgot my Math text book in my locker, and I need it for my homework tonight".

Thank you brilliant cute grammatical Bram Greenfeld.

"I can take you back to school and then drive you home" I say quickly. Maybe too quickly. "if you don't mind dropping off Nick and Abby" I say to Garret.

Garret looks a bit surprised, but says "sure".

And that is how I find myself alone in a car with Blue.


	2. Chapter 2

I'm sitting in the driver's seat. Bram is sitting in the passenger seat. We look at each other for a few seconds, and then I burst out laughing. I could see that Bram is confused.

"I'm sorry. I sometimes laugh when I'm nervous. I'm so happy you're Blue."

Instantly, a look of relief appears on Bram's face.

"I'm happy that you are happy. I was so stressed out today, ever since I put the shirt on your locker."

"That was freaking amazing! I really love it."

All of a sudden a thought came to me.

"Wait! You don't really need to go to school, right?"

A mischievous smile appeared on Bram's face. "No. I really don't". Who knew Bram could be cunning? I love it.

"Good. Just wanted to make sure. So… How are you a president? How come I didn't know we had a president named Bram?"

"Bram is short for Abraham, so…"

"God I'm stupid!"

"You really aren't. You can be a little bit oblivious, but you're definitely not stupid."

"I'm glad you think so. But I really think I had no way of knowing it was you. You didn't give me any clues."

Bram's smile widens. "I did actually. But little subtle ones, you know, like the abbreviation of my name and my birthday."

"Yeah. Wait. What?!"

"My email address – Bram Louis Greenfeld, January 18th."

"Oh my god! I'm a fucking idiot."

"You're cute. And I really like you."

I think I'm melting. Those are the most beautiful words I have ever heard.

"I really like you too."

And we just sit there for a few more minutes, looking out of the car and holding hands. A lot of things are racing through my mind. Can I kiss him? SHOULD I kiss him? Can we go out on dates? Is he ready to be out to the world? How would my parents react if I'll bring him home? Will anyone care that he is black and that I'm white? Will his family care? Do we hold hands in school? Will he come and see me perform? Can I come and see him play? How will we tell our friends? Will Bieber like him? Will he like Bieber? What will happen if Tom Holland will try and hit on him?

He looks at me, and I can tell he's still worried. "What are you thinking about?" he asks me. I tell him everything. Well, everything apart from the questions about the kissing. I don't want to make him uncomfortable.

He looks at me for a second and then says "wow". God, he's so cute.

I laugh, and he quickly joins in.

When we settle down he turns in his seat so he can face me, and then he says "Those are all very good questions. And I thought about it a lot, except the Tom Holland one. That is pure original Simon question."

I really can't control my mouth from smiling.

"Simon, I really want to date you, and I know it's not fair to you, and I'll understand if you won't want to, giving what I'm about to say, but I'm not ready to be out to the world. I know it's mostly in my head, but I'm just scared. I tried to tell Garret the other day, and I just couldn't do it. I knew my mom would love me either way, I have that sort of faith in her, but when I was about to tell Garret, I could see in my mind how he wouldn't want to talk to me anymore or how he might be offended that I kept it a secret and didn't tell him for so long. And there's the team, and the locker rooms, and we play a very physical sport, and I'm afraid they'll act all weird around me and I know it's stupid but I can't-"

My lips are on his. He's a bit taken aback at first. I think he didn't expect it. But then he melts into the kiss and starts kissing me back. It takes us a few seconds to figure out the noses situation, but when we find the right positions it just feels great. Which comes to show you how little I knew an hour ago, when I thought that holding his hand is the best feeling in the world. THIS is the best feeling in the world.

We separate but keep close. Our foreheads pressed against one another's.

"Bram, I'm the last person in the world you need to worry about pressuring you to come out. I know what it's like to be pushed out of the closet before you're ready and I would never to it to anyone, least of all you. I want to date you, and we don’t have to tell anyone until you're 100% ready. We will figure it out, but there is no way that I'm going to lose you, now that I finally have you."

He kisses me softly, cupping my face with his hand. "Thank you. You don't know what it means to me. I really do want to come out to the world, and I think it will be easier with you around."

We start kissing again. Slowly. I can't believe this is happening. Coming to school today, I never imagined finding myself kissing Blue at the Waffle House parking lot.

I look him in the eyes and ask him "Do you trust me?"

He looks a bit pensive, but says "Yes."

"Good" I say. "Give me your phone".

He does.

I open the Spotify app, and search for a playlist I made, called "Songs for Blue". I find it quickly, and press subscribe. "I don't know when exactly, I think it was just before Halloween, when I couldn't stop thinking about you, I started this playlist of songs that made me think of you, or that I wanted you to know, or that I thought you'd enjoy. I knew someday we will meet, and I could show it to you."

He's has this smile on his face, and his eyes are a bit teary. I'm in so much trouble with this boy.

"I don't know what to say. It's so sweet. Play me something from my playlist". _My_ playlist.

I pull my auxiliary cable and connect it to his phone, and press play.     

Violins start to play, and then we hear Peter Gabriel singing 'The Book of Love'. My cheeks turn very red very fast, but I stand by it, and I fight the urge to look away. I lean over acroos the center counsel, and kiss him again. I swear to god, I'm so taken for him that if he'll ask me to marry him right now, I would do it in a heartbeat. I never felt this way before, and I really can't think straight.

"What's next?" I ask him.

"My mom works late on Teusdays, so I think you should come over tomorrow after rehearsal, so you could… let's say… 'help me with some English homework'."

"I think that it will be more believable if we'll say that you're the one helping me, but I like the way you think."  

While still holding his hand, I start to drive to his house. He's giving me directions, and I'm pretty sure that he's taking the long way to his house.

When we turn to his street, I pull over two houses before his. I turn off the engine and turn to look at him.

"You are braver than you know. I know it was scary reaching out, revealing yourself. But you did it so many times so far. When you posted on the Tumblr, when you sent me the first email, when you first signed 'Love, Blue', and today. I don't know when you'll be ready to come out, and all I can tell you is that, whenever you're ready, I want to be there right next to you, holding your hand. Take your time."

"Thank you. Really. You don't know how scared I was that you wouldn't want to date me at all, or that you wouldn't want to date me like this. Thank you for understanding."

"Of course. Now, do you want me to come in with you and say hi to your mom?"

"Ha Ha. Very funny. You're such a dork."

I kiss him again, and then drive up to his house. I hold his hand, and I don't let go even when he opens the door. To be honest, he doesn't try to pull away, and just sits there. Some last seconds of together, before he goes. He looks at me and smiles, and then gets out of the car.

I watch him. When he reaches the house door, he looks at me one last time before going inside.

I think this is going to be great.

  

 


	3. Chapter 3

This was a freaking tiring but awesome week. My daily routine included school in the mornings, rehearses in the afternoons and Bram in the evenings.

Twice I went to his house when his mother was at work. Once we went to the movies, where we sat in the back row, holdings hands and eating Oreos and popcorn. Once we went to Waffle House, but we couldn't shake off our friends. It was fun anyway, but I really wanted to be alone with Bram, where we didn't have to steal glances and small, innocent looking, touches.

Bram feels bad about it. He told me so a few times during the week, that he feels like he's pushing me back to the closet, and making me lie. He's not wrong, but I really couldn't care less at the moment. I'm just happy to be with him, even if it's a secret, and even if I can't share it with other people. At least for now.

I tried to reassure him, but no matter how many times I told him I'm fine with it, and that as long that I get to be with him, I'm happy, he still seemed upset about it.

Now it's Friday, and today we're going to perform our show in front of the school. Seniors and freshmen in the morning, and sophomores and juniors after lunch. I'm really nervous, even though I don't even have any lines. I can't even guess how nervous Abby is. I don't really care how nervous Martin is.

For the show, and in spite my attempts to avoid it, I've had to put on my contact lenses. I have no idea why people prefer it. Why would you want to stick something IN YOUR EYE, and let it rest there the entire day? I hate it.

When I got to the girls dressing room, which is really also the boys dressing room, not that there are so many of us in the show, the girls, led by Abby, convinced me to wear make-up. I trust none of them to get near my face, besides Abby of course, and so I find myself, a bit scarred, under Abby's hands, feeling at least like she controls my future as a respectable human being.

She knows something is up with me. "what aren't you telling me, Simon?" she asks.

Freaking Abby Suso. I immediately blush. "I don't know what you're talking about." I say.

"I won't push you. God knows you've had enough of that lately. I'll just have to do with the fact that you know that I KNOW something is going on. I'll be here when you're ready to share, and I reserve my right to speculate out loud."

"Thanks", I  tell her. I am grateful she's not pushing it. Also, she is currently holding a pencil to my eye, and I wouldn't want to upset her.

"All done", She says. "Simon, the thing I'm not pushing you about, if it has something to do with a boy, I think you should let him see you like this, because you look hot".

It's weird for me to admit, but Abby has a point. The make up and the lack of glasses, really emphasizes my eyes, and it's not a bad look. Actually, I'm kind of excited for Bram to see me.

The first show goes by perfectly. It's the first time we perform our show in front of people, in full costumes and with live music, and it's all very surreal. It's a rush I never experienced before, and it keeps me in a great mood until lunch.

Mercifully, we don't have to go to classes today. I have way to much energy for learning anything, but at the same time, I really want to see Bram, and today we have English and Math together.

Abby and I are waiting for everyone at our regular lunch table. When people are starting to pour in the cafeteria, I search for Bram in the crowd. Then I see him. Standing near the door way, staring at me. For a second I don't get why, but then I remember. I'm still wearing my make-up, and it's the first time Bram sees me without my glasses.

I'm not sure if he likes it or not, until I see him starting to move in my direction with what I can only describe is a very starving smile, aimed at me, and not the mediocre-at-best cafeteria food. He sits down in front of me, and says "Hi". He keeps staring at my eyes. I don't think he even saw that Abby is sitting next to me.

"Hi", I say. And then I hear Abby says "Hi Bram, How was English?".

After what seemed to me like ten minutes, but in reality must have been one second, Bram breaks away and turns to Abby and starts to talk to her.

At the same time I get a text and check it. It's from Abby, who I now notice, is holding her phone under the table.

 _'Bram is totally checking you out!'_. How am I suppose to keep a secret from the all seeing freaking Abby Suso??

I nudge her with my elbow, hoping that that is enough for now, and carry on.

Our lunch table is quickly full of all the regular people, and we talk about our show, and their classes.

Nick says that we should all celebrate tonight, after our second show, and so we make plans to hang out in his basement later on. Bram and Garret volunteer to bring snacks, and Nick says he could probably get us some alcohol.

At some point I can feel Bram's foot gently touching my leg, and I think he tries to signal something with his eyes.

"I want to get some air before the next show. Abby, I'll meet you back at the theater", I say.

While walking away, I hear Bram says that he needs to use the bathroom.

I see him following me outside the cafeteria, and than I sneak in to the library, waiting for him to join me.

We agreed early in the week that the foreign language section at the back of the library would be our private place. No one ever comes back here, and we managed to sneak a few kisses there during the week.

I only have to wait about five seconds before Bram presses me against the shelves and kisses me like he hasn't seen me for months. God, he's a good kisser, and it's really impressing, seeing that his kissing career started four days ago.

"Simon, you are the most beautiful guy I know. I'm so lucky to have you, and I wish we were back at my place now."

"Shit Bram, don't say things like that when I'm about to go on stage, all I'll think about during the show is you and me making out on your bed! And for the record, I'm the lucky one in this relationship."

He kisses me again. I can do this all day.

"Oh", I say, "you should be more careful with your stares. Look at this text Abby sent me when you met us". I show him the text and I can see he's blushing. I was a bit afraid he'll be freaked out that Abby noticed him, but if he is, he doesn't show it.

"It's your fault. You and your grey-moon eyes. I wasn't excepting that. You look extra hot like now."

I stare in to his eyes, and I can see he's thinking something.

"I thought about telling Garret today. That's why I volunteered us to bring snacks, so we'll have some alone time."

"You don't have to do that for me."

"I'm not. Honest. It's time he knows. He is my best friend, and that way, we'll be able to tell our friends about us. I just have to keep my courage long enough, and not coward at the last second like the last time I tried to tell him."

"Whatever you do, I'll be there".

"Good", he says. "You need to head back to the theater, your show is about to start. Break a leg!"

"Thanks! I'll look for you in the audience".

I start walking but he grabs my hand and gives me another kiss. "Simon, would you do me a favor?". He asks it quite shyly, looking mostly at his feet.

"Sure", I say.

"After the show, don't wipe away the eye-liner". Cute Bram Greenfeld. I can't even…

I get to the theater and go change into my costume. Everyone is really excited, but at the time that the show is suppose to start, Ms Albright is nowhere to be found. After a couple of minutes, Ms Albright shows up, and asks me and Martin to follow her to a back room.

What the hell did Martin do now? I really can't stand to look at him.

Ms Albright tells us that someone vandalized the poster for the show, by changing the last two letters of Faggin, next to our names. I swear to god it took Martin two full minutes to figure out what they did, and you could see the moment it hit him.

I can see tears in his eyes when he looks at me and says "I'm so sorry Simon". Ms Albright looks at me funny, as if she is missing something, which se is, and all I can say to Martin is to shut up and get over it.

Ms Albright asks us if we want to cancel the show. "No way", I say. "We worked way too hard for this and we shouldn't let anyone messing with it".

Martin is still pretty shook about it but he nods.

The thing that most bathers me right now is Bram. I kmow he'll feel awful about it, and he would think that this is somehow his fault. As if him coming out would have prevented it. I really feel bad for how bad I  know this would make him feel.

Ms Albright goes out on stage and talks to everyone there about safe space, bullying, tolerance and school by laws. I could swear I heard her use the word "assholes". She is fierce. I think that she is the one you talk about when you refer to the Ally part of LGBTA+.

I send Bram a text, telling him that I'm really fine and looking forward to meeting him after the show. I hope it will help ease things up for him. I receive a heart emoji. Blue, of course. That really calms me down.

After ten minutes of talk, Ms Albright comes down from stage and looks at all of us, waiting to go out. "Kick some asses and make me proud!", she says, and she winks at me as I go out on stage.

The show goes by great. Even better than the first show. We received standing ovation and it made us all feel very welcomed. Also, you could really hear Bram clap, over everyone else there. He looks so excited even Garret looks at him fuuny.

We change out of our costumes and wait for Ms Albright to say a few words. Bram sent me a text  saying  he went with Garret to buy some snacks, and says he'll meet me at Nick's.

Ms Albright goes through some of the things that we could improve for the open show next week, but you could tell she's proud of us. When she finishes up and dismisses us, everybody runs off somewhere, and I stay back, ruffling with my bag for no reason, telling Abby I'll meet her by my car.

Once everyone leaves, I go to Ms Albright who still reviewing her notes. She looks up at me and smiles.

"I just wanted to say thank you. It really helps to know that I have someone like you on my side. It's been rough being out, but when you're around, it makes me feel safer."

She stands up and gives me a hug. "Just keep doing what you do. I've got your back", she says.

And with that, I go and meet Abby.

When I get to my car, Abby is waiting for me, leans against the passenger side door.

"What was that about?" she asks.

"Just wanted to thank her" I say.

"She was pretty cool today. Never heard a teacher call someone an asshole before".

"Where's Nick and Leah?"

"They left already. We should meet them at Nick's".

"Let's go!".

When we arrive to Nick's I see Bram pacing outside, talking on his phone. I tell Abby to go inside, and I wait for him to finish up.

He quickly finishes his conversation, and smiles at me.

"You were great! You really stole the show!" He says.

"I'm pretty sure you're the only one who thinks that, but thank you. I noticed you got a little excited when you clapped."

"I couldn't help it. I was really proud."

"Garret seemed surprised by it. He gave you the weirdest look and you didn't even notice. You really aren't cut out for secret missions as well as you think."

"Yeah… About that, I told him".

I think I know what convinced him to do it.

He continues "I was so angry about those shit faces that vandalized the poster, that I knew I couldn't let you go through it alone any longer. I want to tell our friends, and I don't care who else knows. When you arrived I was just talking to my mom, and told her about you. She wants  to meet you next week, and she mentioned something about another safe sex talk."

"I'm so proud of you. And I would love to meet your mom. How did Garret take it?"

"He just said 'OK. Thanks for telling me. This changes nothing, and whenever you want to go to a gay bar – I'm there'. I was so relieved".

That is why Garret is only a semi-douche. When it counts – he always does and says the right thing, and he really is a good guy.

"You want to go inside?" he asks me, and giving me his hand to hold.

I take his hand and say "You bet".


	4. Chapter 4

As I take Bram's hand, I hold him back, not letting him lead us inside just yet.

He looks at me, his left eye-brow rises and a puzzled look on his face.

"When we go inside, everything is going to change. Not in a bad way. I don't think. But it will change. And before it changes, I wanted to tell you that this was one of the best weeks of my life and I need a couple of more minutes of it before we go in."

He smiles at me, and I get all red in the face and ears.

Bram closes the gap between us and we kiss. I don't think I'll ever get tired of it. We kiss for a couple of minutes, holding each other, and then we decide to go in.

We're still holding hands, and I can see that Bram is nervous.

"Are you sure you're ready?" I ask him.

He takes a deep breath and smiles. "Absolutely".

We open the door and stand at the top of the stairs. Nick and Leah are playing something on Nick's Playstation, and Abby and Garret are next to table, mixing drinks.

No one notices us.

I cough, to try to get everyone's attention. Nothing. Bram looks at me, confused. This is an anti-climax, if I ever saw one.

Bram says "Hey guys". It's not loud, but it's not a whisper also, but still no one looks our way.

Something is wrong. Just as I'm about to shout, Abby bursts up laughing, and everyone soon follows. Garret quickly takes a pictures of our baffled faces, and grins widely. "This is so going on Instagram!"

"You freaking assholes!" I say, but I can't hold it in and I start to laugh as well. Bram smiles, a bit more relaxed.

"You aren't very subtle", Garret said. "Eisner's mom came and told us Simon is kissing someone in her driveway, and we all ran up to see".

What. The. Fuck?!

"Yeah, Sorry Bram, she didn't recognize you with Simon all over you", Nick says.

Bram lets go of my hand, but only to bury his face in his hands. My face turn the reddest shade I think it has ever been.

"I think I'm going to bury myself in your back yard", I say, and quickly turn to leave, but just then Bram catches my arm and says "Oh no! You are not leaving me alone with them!".

We slowly get down the stairs, and when we relax a bit, we stand and wait for what I know is about to happen.

As in a perfectly timed orchestra, everyone starts firing questions toward us, in what sound like gibberish.

I hold my hand up, and everyone becomes silent. "I know we can't avoid it, so at least let's do it right. One question at a time. Nick, as this is your house, and as  it was your mom that sold us out, I think it's only fair that you get the first question".

Nick nods his head. "Very wise my oldest friend. I knew you had potential. Well, my first, but definitely not last question is for Garret". Everybody looks confused, and Nick continues. "Is no one straight anymore? You're straight, right?".

Garret looks at Nick right in the eyes, and without missing a beat, says "Well, actually, now that you brought that up, I do have something I want to share".

I say again. What. The. Fuck?! My mouth hangs open, and so does Nicks, Before Garret continues.

"I am…" Garret takes a deep breath, "Straight. At least I think I am. I wouldn't kick that guy who plays Draco Malfoy out of my bed, but I'm pretty sure he's the only exception".

I'm somehow relieved that Garret didn't come out. I don't think I'm the jealous type, but he is so close to Bram, and he is good looking, I just prefer it this way.

"Next question. Leah?"

Leah seems to think about it, and everyone is looking at her. "How long is this been going on?".

"It's complicated". I look at Bram and make sure he's okay with me telling the story. He nods at me, so I know I can continue. "We started emailing each other in August, but we didn't know each other's identity. We really started to be together, in real life, on Monday".

Leah nods her head, still thinking. "Abby?" I say.

"Why didn't you tell us until now? Or maybe I should ask: why decide to tell us now?", Abby asks.

I open my mouth to answer, but Bram beats me to the punch. "I wasn't ready to come out. I only told Garret on the way over here, and so I asked Simon to keep it between us until I was ready. And as for 'why now', well, you saw what happened today at school. I was so angry and more than a little ashamed that I let Simon go through it alone, and I knew my fears need to stop dictating my actions. Besides, I really want to hold Simon's hand all the time, and seeing as you _insist_ ", Bram rolls his eyes for emphasis, "on being there some of the time, I couldn't see a way around it".

God I like it when Bram talks. I squeeze his hand for support and he looks at me and smiles.

"you damn right we're going to be there!" Abby says, smiling at him.

"Garret, you're up",I say, turning to him.

"I'm good." He says. That was easy. Garret is the definition of easy. My friends should learn a thing or two from him.

Nick steps in. "My turn again, right? Are you ready for the whole school to know, or are you still trying to keep it a secret, just not from us?".

"Still a secret" I say, right as Bram says "everyone should know". We look at each other, and Bram says "I meant what I said. I don't want it to be a secret. I'm ready, I really am." 

I look at him and ask "Are you sure?". He nods. "So I guess we're ready for the whole school to know".

I'm excited about it. Is it weird that out of everyone in school, the only person I want to tell is Ms Albright?

I look to Leah, as it is her turn. She is still thinking. "So, Bram, what do you identify as? Sexuality speaking. If you don't mind the question".

I'm a bit nervous about his answer. I think I know what he's going to say, but we never really talked about the different type of sexual orientation definitions, and where we each see ourselves in.

Bram bites his lower lip. In the last week I came to know that this is what he does when he thinks. "I'm most comfortable with referring to myself as gay. I thought about it a lot, but I really don't have any attraction to women what so ever."

Leah looks like she wants to say something, but Abby cuts her off and asks "When did you figure out that you're you? With the emails I mean".

"Well", Bram answers, "I figured it out a couple of months ago, and Simon, being Simon, figured it out just after I pretty much told him so, on Monday". Bram smiles to me, and I feel my ears burning.

"I never expected anything else from our innocent and oblivious friend over here" Nick says, "He can be really dense sometimes".

"Hey!" I try to protest, but I know he's right.

"It's okay, when it's not aimed at you, it can be really cute", Bram says.

"Get a room, why don't you?" Garret says. "If you're going to start making out everywhere, I'll call Eisner's mom to break it up".

"Shit. That's so embarrassing!", I say.

"Don't sweat about it, you know she just want you to be happy. I just hope you told your mom, because you must know they talk about everything".

How did I not think about it?? I stare ahead, terrified. I won't hear the end of it when I'll get home. Maybe I can stop Nick's mom before she calls my mom? I start to run up the stairs yelling "Mrs Eisner!", and when I get to the living room I see her drinking coffee. Sitting across my mom, who also has a cop of coffee in her hands.

Oh shit.

Mrs Eisner looks amused, and I can't think of what to say.

"Hi Mom", is all I can get out of my mouth. Right then I hear footsteps behind me, and I pray that it's someone who came to kill me, but no such luck.

I hear Mrs Eisner says "Oh, hi Bram. Nice to see you again. I think I'll leave you to talk alone for a couple of minutes. Emily, call me when you're done. Good luck boys", and with that she gets up, and walks towards the kitchen.  

 


	5. Chapter 5

I stare at my mom, who stares at me and Bram. I really can't tell what's going through her head. Is she disappointed that I didn't tell her sooner? Does she have a problem with Bram being black? What exactly did Mrs Eisner tell her? Why don't she just say something?

Then I take a deep breath and try to defuse the tension. "Mom, this is Bram. He's my boyfriend." I grab Bram's hand in mine. "We started dating on Monday, but our relationship started, in a way, much earlier, but it's a long story."

She looks at me and she looks part annoyed, part curious. "Which I will definitely tell you, in length, as soon as humanly possible". She seems more content.

"Hello Bram. So very nice to meet you. I'm Emily."

"Nice to meet you too Mrs Spier". Bram says, and I can tell he's really nervous.

"You can call me Emily. Now, I hope this won't come out as rude, you seem like a very nice young man, but I would like to talk to Simon alone if you don't mind." My mom tries her best to keep calm while Bram is here. At least that's better than the alternative.

"Of course Mrs Spier", Bram says.

"You can really call me Emily, dear".

"No problem Mrs Spier", Bram says and turns to leave, while whispering to me "I'll see you downstairs. Good luck".

Just before Bram leaves the room, he turns to face my mom and say "I wasn't out before today. Only my mom knew I was gay. And Simon of course. I wasn't ready to make it public, and Simon was just trying to protect me. When Mrs Eisner saw us, it was right when I told Simon that I was ready to come out. Please don't be mad at him because I've put him in a difficult situation." And before me or my mom try to respond, he's down at the basement.

I look at my mom, who looks pensive, and tell her "He didn't ask me not to tell you guys specifically. That was my decision. We didn't want anyone to know, but he never told me to lie to you, and I'm sure he would've been fine if I did tell you. I just didn't want to put him in an awkward position".

My mom looks at me for a full minute, without talking. One of the benefits of having a mom who's a psychologist, is that she almost never spits something out without thinking. She knows that the wrong word at the wrong time can do some real damage. On the other hand, waiting for a response is nerve wrecking.

When she seems ready, she says "I think I understand where you're coming from, but I thought you were done with hiding things from us. I have to say that I was very angry and disappointed when Caroline called me. But, given Bram's privacy and the fact that you guys have been dating for less then a week, I think you made a reasonable judgment call. I still wish you would feel comfortable enough to confide in us, or that you would have thought about talking to Bram about it."

"You're right. I should have talked to Bram about it, and I should have told you." I tell her, and she seems relaxed again. I sit down next to her, and continue, "But, if I'm honest, I feel like everything I do now is being watched and treated as a big deal. Having this past five days with Bram, alone, without anyone knowing was, well, great. It was like we could get used to being with each other without feeling like we're being tested or something."

My mom raises her eyebrow at me "when you say 'being with each other'…".

"God, mom, I meant hanging out. I'm not ready to have sex and I'm definitely not ready to have a sex talk, so please don't go there."

She smiles at me.

"I think I am ready for you guys to get to know Bram. He's really great and I really like him."

She nods and tells me that I shoud invite him for dinner next weekend.

It's good to be able to talk to her honestly. One of the things I try to change is my ability to talk to my parents. In some way, I feel like I owe them to be more open and to be more honest.

I hug my mom and walk down to meet everyone. When I pass through the door I can still here Mrs Eisner ask my mom "Did you tell him about the picture I took of them that I sent you?". I cringe. What is wrong with this woman?!

When I get too the basement, everyone is looking at me. "it's fine", I say. "Not thanks to your mom", I tell nick.

Bram comes to me and holds my hand. "She invited you to dinner next weekend. You didn't have to tell her that I didn't tell her because of you, but thanks. It's all sorted out", I tell him, and kiss him on the cheek.

Everyone goes back to normal after this. Garret and Bram are talking about something soccer related that I really don't get, Nick is playing the Playstation, and Abby is  on her phone.

Leah comes to me. "I'm really happy for you guys. I don't really know Bram all too well, but he seems like a good match for you. You could use some order in your life."

Leah always knew how to say the right thing. But she looks weird. Not sad exactly, but like she has something on her mind. "Are you okay? You look a bit off", I tell her.

She straightens herself a bit, and put on a bigger smile. "Of course I'm okay. Just promise me we'll still hang out, and that you won't be one of those people who gets sucked into their relationship and forgets about anyone else."

"Leah, you're my best friend. You could never get rid of me", I assure her.

"Good", she says. But I have a feeling something else is bothering her. Whatever it is, I won't push it. Leah is not the kind of person you can push to tell you something that she doesn't want to share.

We order pizza and play Cards Against Humanity. All in all, it  doesn't feel different from other nights we just hung out together, but now I have Bram with me, and it makes things that much better.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for a short one, but that's what came out this time. It's not methodical, and not planned.  
>  I really don't know Nick's mom's name. Caroline is the name of Becky Albertalli's sister.


	6. Chapter 6

Now that my friends knew about Bram, and I could see my life calming down, I knew I needed to do one more thing, that will put this whole Martin Addison shit storm to an end.

I have to confess to Abby.

That is why I called everyone to Waffle house the next morning. It's now 10am and I'm sitting there with Bram for the last 20 minutes, biting my nails, waiting for everyone to show up. I told them to be here at 10, but I think that they are so used to me being late all the time, that they don't bother showing up for another 15 minutes.

When they get here, all three of them are sitting in front of me, Bram, as it already became our custom, holding my hand under the table.

"There is one last piece of the puzzle that you don't know, and have a right to know, especially you Abby", I tell them.

I'm nervous. It's not exactly like coming out, but it is, in some way.

"You remember the Tumblr post about me."

"Of course. The one with the 'anal butt-sex', like there is a different kind of butt-sex", Leah says, dead serious.

This makes me smile a little. But then I remember what I'm about to do, and I'm back to my nervous self.

"That's the one. Well, I actually know who wrote it, and why". They all look surprised. Bram squeezes my hand to show his support. "Martin Addison", I say.

I let it sink in, and I see that they are getting angry. Leah especially looks like she is starting to plan Martin's untimely demise.

"There's more", I continue. "I stupidly left my secret email account logged in in the library one day, and martin took screenshots of my correspondent with Bram, though, luckily, he didn't know that is was, in fact, Bram. That was a few months ago."

"So why did he decide to out you when he did?" Abby asks. I cringe when I think about what's coming next.

"He… well.. he kind of blackmailed me".

Leah can't hold it together anymore. "That slimy piece of horse shit! I am going to kill him once I figure out a way to do it without getting caught".

"What do you mean 'he blackmailed' you? What did he want of you?" Nick asks.

"He wanted… well, he wanted Abby", I'm ready for the punch.

"What does that mean, exactly?", Abby asks, a look of hurt spread upon her face.

I tell her everything. What he asked, what I did, what I refused to do. She has some follow up questions and I answer them all, fully.

After about ten minutes of answering everyone's questions, they seat quietly for about a minute. Leah looks furious, and I know she's mad at Martin, but I don't know if she's also mad at me. Nick looks like he wants to punch something (like a nose that is attached to one Martin Addison), and Abby seems sad, which, to be honest, is the worst reaction of them all.

"You guys don't know what it's like living in fear of being outed, and living in fear of getting someone else outed because of a mistake you've made", Bram says finally. "Simon and I talked about it a lot these past few days, and on top of that, he also feared he'd lose me, or Blue if i'm being more accurate, which was not an unfounded fear. I really can't tell you how I would have reacted if our emails were to get out, but I can tell you, that if it would have happened three months ago or even three weeks ago, I would have considered it the end of the fucking world".

It's a bit of a surprise really. I think it's the most Leah and Abby ever heard Bram say in one go, and I wasn't expecting that at all. Also, it's very weird to hear Bram swear.

"I need a minute", Abby says and walks out. She's standing outside, near the entrance, and I don't know what to do.

"should I go to her?", I ask. Nick shakes his head. "No. I'll go."

Nick gets up, but before he can take a step, Leah grabs his hand. "No. You can't help now. I know what to say. You stay here.", and she gets up and walk to Abby.

Nick looks confused. "What was that about?".

Bram and I both shrug.

"Dude, I'm not mad at you. And I'm sure Abby will come around. I just wish you would have told us when it happened. I really do believe that if we had left Martin in a room with Leah for five minutes, everything would have been sorted out, and we could have gone to visit Leah every week at prison". Nick starts laughing from his own joke. I crack a smile, but I'm too nervous, and I keep looking through the window, trying to see what's going on outside.

I see Leah talking, and Abby just nods. Suddenly, Abby snaps her eyes wide, and is looking shocked. She hugs Leah, who seems half uncomfortable and half thankful, and then Abby starts smiling.

What did Leah say to her?

Leah and Abby stay outside for another five minutes. It looks like Leah is doing most of the talking, but Abby definitely has some things to say.

Finally, they come back inside, and sit down.

Abby looks at me, and after what seems to be about ten minutes, but in reality is probably around ten seconds, she says "I won't lie to you Simon. I'm hurt by what you did. It was a really sucky thing to do to a friend, especially when you could've told me earlier, like, when you first came out to me, and maybe I could've helped, and even prevent that asshole from posting that shit post. But, after talking to Leah I think I can forgive you. It might take some time for me to fully trust you, but I do want to get there, because you are my friend after all, and you were being blackmailed".

I sigh in relief, and I thinks my hands are shaking, because Bram tries to steady me. "I really am sorry", I say, my eyes are watering, and I'm trying to hold back the tears, "It was extremely crappy of me".

I look at Leah and tell her "Thank you", without making a sound. She nods and smiles, before she suddenly sits up, a stern look on her face, and say "Now, to business. What do we do with that sub human ass face who is Martin fucking Addison?".


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The talk between Abby and Leah, outside of Waffle House.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some LOTO spoilers.

Leah's POV

This is a shit situation. I really think I could kill Martin, and no one would fault me if I did.

Not only has he blackmailed my best friend and then outed him, he's driving a wedge between him and Abby, and if Abby and Simon fall out, I'm going to have to pick sides, and I can't lose Simon and I don't want to lose Abby.

I wish Simon would have trusted me with all this crap in real time. I know I could've handled Martin fucking Addison. But I'm the last person who needs to be told how hard it is to come out. I mean, my mom knows about me for several years now, and I still can't bring myself to come out to my best friends, one of which, is gay himself.

I need to take care of this situation, because Simon can't, Abby won't, and Nick just doesn't know enough to make it right. I just hope that I could do it without having to tell too much, because I'm not ready for that.

I tell Nick I'll handle Abby, and I walk to where she's standing, nervous, not for the first time, about having to talk to her.

"I know that what Simon did is wrong, but-", I try to say, but she cuts me off.

"No, Leah. Don't try to justify it! I'm new here and I trusted him fully, and he goes off and does a thing like that! I can't believe it."

"Please try and understand him. That fuckface Martin was threatening to out him!"

"That's not an excuse Leah."

"Maybe not, but it's a reason, and you really don't know what it's like to be in that situation."

"Neither have you, but I'm sure that if it would've happened to you, you never would have done that, even that you and I talk less to each other than to the boys."

"Abby, if Martin ever tried to blackmail me, they never would've found his body", and I can see her trying not to laugh at that, "but Simon is not me, and you don't know what the weight of a secret like that can make someone do".

I don't know if she reads between the lines, but she gives me a look as if she only now starting to see me. I think she's calmer, I just hope she doesn't make me say it.

"I think I do know what a secret can make you do. But even that doesn't justify this. I don't see how I can forgive this."

"Abby, I don't think you fully understands. For you, being yourself is natural, it's everyday. Simon had to struggle every fucking second of every fucking day because he didn't know how his family was going to react, because he was afraid to be bullied or physically harmed – we are still in Georgia don't forget, because he didn't want people to talk about him behind his back, because he didn't want to be labeled as 'the gay kid', and add to that the fact that all this is dangling out of his reach by Martin fucking Addison. Being thrown out of the closet before you're ready can make the best of them to do much worse than playing matchmaker, and I know that Simon is the best of them, even if he's careless and oblivious".

She doesn't say anything. She just stares at me, nodding lightly.

"I know it's maybe too much to ask of you, given what Simon told you, but I need you to trust me, Abby. I need you to trust me enough to know that Simon deserves your forgiveness. He'll have to show you himself that he also deserves your trust, but you have to give him the chance to do it. He's not the bad guy in this situation, and I'm sure he feels worse than you can imagine." She doesn't say anything.

"He's starting something new with Bram and I know he needs us. I need us to be there for him".

"Why?", she asks me. One simple word throws me to a world of thoughts, which all sums up to this: Am I ready to come out to Abby so she would forgive Simon? Am I ready to be the fierce friend I tell myself I am?

"Because I need you all to be there for me when I come out." It's done.

Before I know what's happening, Abby's arms are around my neck and she's hugging me. "Leah, this is great! Thank you so much for telling me. I am here for you, and it changes nothing between us."

This is not what I expected, but I'll take it. To be honest, I don't really know what I expected. Maybe a smile and a nice word. Maybe some shock in her voice. Maybe, just maybe, for her to come out too and kiss me? I need to focus again. I gently wiggle out of the hug and smile.

"Thank you." Damn, my eyes are watery. Where did that come from?! I don't want to cry right now. "I'm sorry", I say and wipe my face. "I'm just… Thank you for being cool about it".

"Of course. So… you're in to girls?"

"And boys. I'm Bi".

"And does anyone know about you?"

"Just my mom, she knew since I was, like, 12. And now you. I'm not ready for the boys to find out, so can we just keep it between us?"

"Of course. I won't tell anyone". I believe her. "But you know, I have a feeling Simon and Bram would be okay with it".

"Oh you know nothing. I know that Simon won't mind me not being straight, but you can't tell him something that will change his world without weeks of minor mental preparations, or I think he will break."

Finally, she laughs.

"But seriously, I know it's dumb, and I'm not afraid of their reaction, but I'm not ready. I need more time."

"You're the boss. Thanks again for trusting me. I can see how important this is to you, and I know now, better than before, how important Simon is to you. And to me, if I'm honest. That's why it hurts as much as it does. But I'm willing to forgive, or at least to try and forgive him. Maybe I'll feel better after we plan Martin's untimely demise."

"I like the way you think, and I have some ideas already, but I think we should to this as a group, don't you think?"

"Sure", she says, and I let go of the air I didn't know I was holding. I think it's going to be OK. I think it was worth it.

"Lead the way".

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know it's short and very late. it's been busy.


	8. Chapter 8

It's now the day of the show. It's been a weird time for me, but in the best way possible. Bram and I see each other whenever we can (which isn't a lot), sometimes with our friends, and sometimes just the two of us. I know it's only been a few weeks, but I got so used to being with him and talking to him and texting him all the time, that can't imagine anything else. I really don't know what I did before we started dating.

We did not kill Martin, although Leah had some solid plans. I know it's not just me that got hurt by Martin, but as I am his main victim, everyone accepted my lead when I told them, a couple of days after our Waffle House murder planning session, that I would rather focus on the good things happening and let Martin live without having to think about him.

Now, all that would have been just fine, if it weren't for one Martin Addison, deciding to "come clean" to Abby an hour before our show.

When I get close to the dressing room, I can hear loud screams, and then a door slams shut. It turns out that after Martin mis-timed confession, Abby couldn't take it anymore, and started screaming at him, mostly about him outing me. This was witnessed by half the cast and Ms Albright, and was followed by Martin starting to cry and locking himself in one of the bathroom stalls.

We're called the Drama Club for a reason.

"I won't let him go on stage. I can't believe it. I always thought he was just a harmless clown, but this is off limit", Ms Albright looks shocked. "Simon, do you know Martin's part? Can you fill in?" she asks me.

"No", I say. "And even if I would, I really don't want it. As much as it hurts me to say it, Martin is good, and we rehearsed our asses off for this. Kicking him out of the show now, will only punish the rest of us."

"You're wrong Simon", Abby says, staring at me. "I know you can do it, and it would only be fair."

"No, Abby. I mean it. This would not be good for us, and it's not fair to put me in this situation".

"So, we'll cancel the show. I can't have him go on stage, knowing what I know", Ms Albright says.  

"No!" I say. This is getting out of hand. "Please. Can we talk in private?"

She nods, and leads me out to the side of the stage. Abby comes along. "Ms Albright, please. I know what you think about me and other LGBTQ+ teens, I know that you, better than any other teacher in this school, create a safe space for us, and I know, believe me, I know, that Martin was wrong, to the brink of a hate crime, but you know as well as I do, that he is misguided and not evil. Don't get me wrong, I hate him for what he did to me" I look at Abby, "to us, but it would hurt all of us if you cancel the show."

"Damn. I never thought that Simon would be the sensible one", Abby says.

"That IS a shocker", Ms Albright says, half-smiling at me. "Fine. You'll get your show. But this will not go un-punished. I'll go talk to Martin".

And she goes.

Abby is looking at me now, "Why ARE you being so sensible? I know you know the part."

"Because, like it or not, and I don't, Martin will be better. I didn't rehearse it, not seriously, and I won't let him fuck up another thing that is important in my life." She seems to get it. "Abby, what's done is done, I'm happy now, because of you, among other things. Don't let him ruin our lives any more than he already did".

"Bram is really rubbing off on you, hasn't he?"

"I wish", I say, before realizing what I said, and immediately turning red.

Abby bursts out laughing. At least she's not angry anymore.

After about five minutes, Ms Albright comes back and says "He won't do it. He said he doesn't deserve to be in the play." Fucking Martin Addison.

"I'll talk to him", I say.  And that is how I find myself in the bathroom, talking to Martin fucking Addison, through the door of a stall.

"Martin, come out of there, we need to talk", I say.

"Simon? What are you doing here? I thought you don't want to talk to me anymore".

"I really don't. But you're being an ass. I convinced Ms Albright to keep you in the play, and you run and hide? What the fuck?".

"I hurt you, and I hurt Abby, and you know I don't deserve to be in this play. I'm so sorry Simon, I really am. I swear I'm not homophobic, and I didn't think about what I was doing, I was just desperate, I wanted to be with Abby so bad".

"Martin, I most definitely don't forgive you. And to be honest, I don’t even like you. What I really want to do, is tell your brother what you did, and let him deal with you. But I'll make you a deal. I won't tell your brother anything, if you go out and do the fucking play!"

"I already told him. Yesterday. He made me realize what I've done. I'm so sorry Simon, you have to believe me."

"I really don't". This is a weird situation. I'm still talking to a door! "How did it all come to me, talking you into being in the fucking play? I mean – what the fuck?! You know what – do what you want. But I'm telling you this, if you don’t do the play, you would only keep hurting me, Abby, and everyone else. Take a minute to wash your face, and come the fuck out of there. Be an actor for fucks sake."

And with that, I leave him alone. I think he brings all the "fucks" from me. I never said it as many times in one go.

When I step out, Abby and Ms Albright are waiting by the door. "Well?" Ms Albright asks me.

"If he has half a brain, he'll be out in a minute", I say. "If not, we'll send Leah".

After about two minutes, because Martin can't even follow basic instructions, Martin comes out of the bathroom. "I'm ready". Fucking Martin Addison.

"We'll talk after the show", Ms Albright tells him. "Everyone, get ready!"

And we're off. Everything is in chaos now, while everyone gets in their costumes and make up. But in a good way. It's like there's electricity in the air.

I think it's going to be a good show. I can't wait for my parents to see it. And Nora too. And Bram. Mostly Bram.  

 


End file.
